Ask Cheryl: Should You Give Yourself a Baby Shower?

Sometimes, expectant mothers are understandably excited about their little one’s arrival and want to ensure they have everything they need. This may cause them to wonder if someone will honor them with a baby shower. Our reader wants to know if it’s OK for a mom-to-be to host her own baby shower.

Cheryl,

When is it proper to give yourself a baby shower for a future baby, complete with a baby gift list (registry)? Seems a little gauche to me.

Larry


Hi Larry,

Giving yourself a baby shower is never appropriate. You are correct; it is gauche. A shower, by its nature, is a gift-giving event with the sole purpose of showering the mom-to-be with gifts. Therefore, it’s still considered improper to host a shower for yourself. It’s best to wait until someone offers to do so.

Who should host a baby shower?

It’s considered best etiquette for a friend or non-immediate family member to host a baby shower. There are some exceptions, and this “rule” seems to be loosening, so we see more sisters and moms of expectant parents hosting baby showers. However, aunts, cousins, and friends are still deemed the most appropriate hosts. For more baby shower etiquette, see our article, Baby Shower Etiquette—Rules to Party By.

Baby (and wedding) showers are totally optional events – not a requirement. Not everyone has the financial means or the time to throw a party. But if you’re an expecting mom, don’t worry! Rest assured that many of your friends and family will celebrate your baby with a gift after the baby arrives.

Whether or not a baby shower is held, expecting parents should still create a baby gift registry for any baby. Friends and family will want to give baby gifts, and a baby registry will be helpful to any gift giver.


If you have questions or comments about gift giving, bridal shower, baby shower, or wedding etiquette, please comment below or email AskCheryl@RegistryFinder.com.

Emails in this column are received from readers. Emails may be edited for spelling, length, and grammar or to remove sensitive information. However, we are careful not to alter the intent or content of the question.

Cheryl Seidel is the founder and President of RegistryFinder.com, an intuitive search engine that helps gift givers quickly and easily find online registries for weddings, baby showers, graduations, and more.

By Cheryl Seidel

Cheryl is a happily married mom to two adult children and has recently enjoyed being a mother-of-the-bride. Her background in product development and marketing led Cheryl to create RegistryFinder.com, a search engine for gift registries, in 2012. Long considered a gift-giving and gift etiquette expert, her firm belief is that gifting should be fun, easy, and stress-free! Readers regularly write to Cheryl about their etiquette questions and she answers them here on our blog.

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