Ask Cheryl: Registry Info on a Wedding Announcement?

Over the past few years, many couples have chosen more intimate weddings, then informed family and friends of their nuptials with a printed wedding announcement. But when newly wedded couples include registry information on that announcement, should those receiving it feel obligated to send a gift?

Dear Cheryl,

My niece’s son had a small outdoor wedding in the mountains and I did not know about it until afterward. I did not receive an invitation, but after the wedding I received a formal wedding announcement with the couple’s wedding picture and gift registry information.

Am I expected to give a gift? Should I feel obligated to do so? I would like to just send a card with heartfelt congratulations, but don’t feel I should have to give a gift. What do you think?

Thank you!

Shirley


Wedding Announcement courtesy of Etsy Seller DottieAndCaro

Dear Shirley,

Oh my, that was awkward — for the couple, I mean. Etiquette is pretty straightforward here. It’s an excellent idea for couples to send out wedding announcements to friends and family to notify them of their nuptials. However, a wedding gift should not be expected or mentioned (i.e., registry information). Seems like a not-so-subtle hint if you ask me.

Unlike a wedding invitation, an announcement does not carry the obligation of a gift. To answer your question simply: You are not expected, nor should you feel obligated to give a wedding gift. A card with your congratulations is totally appropriate. If someone else was so moved to send a gift, that would be fine also.


If you have questions or comments about this post or about gift giving, bridal shower, baby shower, or wedding etiquette, please comment below or email AskCheryl@RegistryFinder.com.

Questions in this column are received from readers. They may be edited for spelling, length, and grammar or to remove sensitive information. However, we are careful not to alter the intent or content of the question.

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By Cheryl Seidel

Cheryl is a happily married mom to two adult children and has recently enjoyed being a mother-of-the-bride. Her background in product development and marketing led Cheryl to create RegistryFinder.com, a search engine for gift registries, in 2012. Long considered a gift-giving and gift etiquette expert, her firm belief is that gifting should be fun, easy, and stress-free! Readers regularly write to Cheryl about their etiquette questions and she answers them here on our blog.

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