Over the past few years, many couples have chosen more intimate weddings, then informed family and friends of their nuptials with a printed wedding announcement. But when newly wedded couples include registry information on that announcement, should those receiving it feel obligated to send a gift?
Dear Cheryl,
My niece’s son had a small outdoor wedding in the mountains and I did not know about it until afterward. I did not receive an invitation, but after the wedding I received a formal wedding announcement with the couple’s wedding picture and gift registry information.
Am I expected to give a gift? Should I feel obligated to do so? I would like to just send a card with heartfelt congratulations, but don’t feel I should have to give a gift. What do you think?
Thank you!
Shirley
Dear Shirley,
Oh my, that was awkward — for the couple, I mean. Etiquette is pretty straightforward here. It’s an excellent idea for couples to send out wedding announcements to friends and family to notify them of their nuptials. However, a wedding gift should not be expected or mentioned (i.e., registry information). Seems like a not-so-subtle hint if you ask me.
Unlike a wedding invitation, an announcement does not carry the obligation of a gift. To answer your question simply: You are not expected, nor should you feel obligated to give a wedding gift. A card with your congratulations is totally appropriate. If someone else was so moved to send a gift, that would be fine also.
If you have questions or comments about this post or about gift giving, bridal shower, baby shower, or wedding etiquette, please comment below or email [email protected].
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