Many couples are choosing to hold smaller weddings and inform family and friends afterward via a printed wedding announcement. But when couples include registry information, should those receiving the announcements feel obligated to send a gift? Cheryl weighs in below.
My niece’s son had a small outdoor wedding on the coast and I did not know about it until afterward. I did not receive an invitation. After the wedding I received a formal wedding announcement in the form of a card with the couple’s wedding picture and gift registry information. Am I now expected to give a gift? Should I feel obligated to do so? I would like to just send a card with heartfelt congratulations but don’t feel I should have to give a gift. What do you think?
Thank you for writing!
Oh my, that was awkward — for the couple, I mean. Etiquette is pretty straightforward here. It’s a great idea for couples to send out wedding announcements to friends and family to notify them of their nuptials, but a wedding gift should not be expected or mentioned (in the form of registry information). Seems like a not-so-subtle hint if you ask me.
Unlike a wedding invitation, an announcement does not carry the obligation of a gift. To answer your question simply: You are not expected, nor should you feel obligated to give a wedding gift. A card with your congratulations is totally appropriate. If someone else was so moved to send a gift, that would be fine also.
Best of luck!
If you have questions or comments about this post, or about gift giving, bridal shower, baby shower, or wedding etiquette, please comment below or email AskCheryl@RegistryFinder.com.
Questions in this column are received from readers. They may be edited for spelling, length and grammar, or to remove sensitive information. However, we are careful not to alter the intent or content of the question.
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Cheryl Seidel is an etiquette writer and the founder of RegistryFinder.com, an intuitive search engine that helps gift givers quickly and easily find online registries for weddings, baby showers, graduations and more.