– Ask Cheryl – Should Future Grandmas Invite Each Other to Baby Showers They are Hosting?

Today, we’re tackling two hot topics when it comes to baby showers: who should host and who should be invited.

With two future grandmas hosting separate events, Cheryl advises how best to handle the question of whether it’s appropriate for the grandmas-to-be to invite one another.

Hi Cheryl,

Both the future grandmas are holding separate baby showers. Do they invite each other to the showers they are hosting?

Thanks for your advice,


Dear Jada,

We are exploring new territory here. In the past, it was considered gauche or inappropriate for the mother of the expectant parents to host a baby shower.

This norm seems to be changing, and it’s understandable for a grandma-to-be to be excited to celebrate a grandchild, but I still think a friend or aunt is a better choice.

Your question is, “Should the future grandmas invite each other to the showers they are hosting?”

There is no right or wrong answer here. Logic and best judgment should be your guide. It’s traditional for the mothers of the couple to be invited to the baby shower, so in that vein, the answer would be yes.

However, if they don’t live in the same area and attending would require travel, then they should probably not invite each other. If there are any issues between the parties, such as competitiveness, it might be best to keep the parties separate and each enjoy their own party.

If there are no extenuating circumstances, I think it would be a nice gesture for each of them to include the other when hosting their baby shower.

If you have questions or comments about this post, gift giving, bridal showers, baby showers, or wedding etiquette, please comment below or email [email protected].

Questions in this column are received from readers. They may be edited for spelling, length, and grammar or to remove sensitive information. However, we are careful not to alter the intent or content of the question.

2 thoughts on “Ask Cheryl: Should Future Grandmas Invite Each Other to Baby Showers They are Hosting?

  1. Hello! I will be attending my Daughter-in-law & son’s baby shower. Her mother is hosting and my Sister-in-Law will be hosting one for our side of the family in a few weeks. Should I bring a gift to my DIL’s mother’s shower? I have made a quilt and already purchased and given a rocking chair as well.

  2. Hi Tracy,

    It’s really up to you. You do not need to bring a gift to the shower since you have already given them a large gift. But, if you want her to open something from you at the shower, then you could get something small from her registry. If you feel she will have plenty of gifts to open, then I would skip it.

    Trust me, you will continue to give them gifts. After the baby is born, you will see things they need and try to fill in those gaps. I cannot resist an opportunity to buy something for my granddaughter. 🙂

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