Today’s question comes from a second-time mom who wonders about the etiquette of creating a registry and hosting her own Sprinkle. What’s appropriate, and what’s not?

Hello Cheryl,

I have a question regarding a baby registry and shower. I am having my second baby (a boy) and I have a daughter who is one. We have lots of baby stuff from her, but will need some additional items for two and we have a lot of pink around the house. Is it appropriate to register? I wanted to create a registry not just so others can shop, but to earn the discount at the end and also to keep track of what I have and what I still need.

I also wanted to host a sprinkle or get together at my house with close family and friends. Is it odd to do that? My mother has passed away and my mother-in-law and I are not that close, so I don’t see her throwing a little something. I am happy to do it myself, but wanted to make sure I was following etiquette as to not insult anyone.

I look forward to hearing your feedback.

Regards,
Stacy

Hi Stacy,

Congratulations! Many ask if they should register for their second baby. The answer is “yes” — if you want to, you absolutely should. From an etiquette point of view, there is nothing wrong with registering for your second or even third child. A registry is an excellent tool for those who want to buy you a gift. It gives them confidence that they are buying you something you want and need. 

A gift registry is a suggestion, not a request. Your friends and family know they aren’t required to buy a gift from your registry, but most appreciate that they don’t have to guess what you need. For more details, please see our article, “Top 5 Reasons to Create a Baby Registry for Your 2nd or 3rd Child.”

Creating your registry is appropriate, but the same can’t be said about hosting your own Baby Shower or Sprinkle. This is one etiquette “rule” that does not have wiggle room. A Sprinkle is a smaller, more intimate baby shower, but gifts are still expected.

Understandably, you want to get things in order for your new baby boy, but you should not host a Sprinkle for yourself. It is a gift-giving event, so having one for yourself can come off as tacky. Please see my article, “Should You Give Yourself a Baby Shower?”

I advise waiting until a friend or relative offers to host a shower for you; then, you can let her know your preference that you’d like it to be on the smaller side (a Sprinkle). A baby shower is nice to have but not a necessity. I recommend being patient and seeing if someone offers.

Another option is to host a Sip’ N See after your baby is born. Gifts are not required, and it’s a great way to get together with close family and friends. It’s often a drop-in event and a great way to introduce your new baby.

If you have questions or comments about this post, gift giving, bridal showers, baby showers, or wedding etiquette, please comment below or email AskCheryl@RegistryFinder.com.

Questions in this column are received from readers. Questions may be edited for spelling, length, and grammar or to remove sensitive information. However, we are careful not to alter the intent or content of the question.